8% of adult Americans are idiots

Proof that humans should be entertaining the dolphins in amusement parks, instead of the other way around:

(CNN) — If presidential elections were held today, Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton would likely have a comfortable edge over Sen. John McCain, but take away her maiden name and McCain has a better shot of landing in the Oval Office.

So say the results of a CNN poll released Friday by Opinion Research Corp., which asked 506 adult Americans whom they preferred among potential 2008 presidential candidates. The margin of error for the survey is plus or minus 4.5 percent.

Asked if they preferred Hillary Rodham Clinton to McCain, respondents gave the Democratic New York senator and former first lady a 51 percent to 44 percent advantage over the Republican Senator from Arizona. [Clinton had a 7 point advantage]. [When asked if they prefered Hillary Clinton to McCain,] McCain had a 1 percentage point advantage, 48 percent to 47 percent. [-Edits mine, this writer has some difficulty making data intelligible.]

I'm goin' vampire huntin'

I go to Walmart. I admit it. It takes forever to get checked out. The place suffers from massive inefficiency and near-chaos. They’re always out of stock of exactly what I came to buy. And of course, they’re evil. But this is offset by the fact it takes longer to get anywhere else, and I find the human drama that goes on there interesting. I try to infect checkers with smiles, and I push my cart back inside so the workers can continue to slack off on Wally’s dime. (What little they actually get of it.)

Today, I bought a weapon: